3.15.2012

Are You Calling My Boob Fat?

I just returned from my morning of medical appointments. You know ... the one we've all been waiting for. My mammogram. Where they smushed my boobies flat like pancakes. Or to be more 'haute cuisine', like crepes.

It was a long visit. From waiting an additional half-hour due to technician training in one exam room, to needing additional imaging.

I tried to keep Matt in the loop by texting him every so often letting him know what was going on. He was fine for the first hour, reading his magazine and people watching. But by the end of the second hour I received a message from him saying he was about to resort to violence if he had to listen to any more soft rock ballads.

The mammogram went fine. I mean, as fine as standing in a gown with your boobs exposed to a stranger wearing plastic gloves can be. The technician took two images of each breast, placing me in positions that no woman should ever have to be subjected without getting paid.

It was relatively quick and painless, albeit slightly embarrassing, and within ten minutes I was sent back to my changing room waiting for the next steps. Twenty minutes later, the doctor reviewing my films said that she did see something on the screen, and I now needed to have an ultrasound. Off to the next room we went.

The ultrasound took much longer as the doctor spent a lot of time reviewing my previous mammogram images and comparing them to the lump she saw. She poked, fondled, grabbed and inspected and in the end felt sure that she had the correct diagnosis.

I have a Lipoma ... which is a slow-growing lump made up of fat cells. They are a common, benign, non-cancerous type of slow growing tumors. Usually detected in middle age.

And there's nothing I need to do except watch it and have yearly mammograms.

But wait, there's more!

After getting the good news about my "girls" ... we THEN went to see my Endocrinologist because my Thyroid has been out of whack again due to the increased dosage, and I switched again from hypothyroid to hyperthyroid. Oye! Moreover, the symptoms of the excess Synthroid were causing me to have anxiety, heart palpitations, EXCESSIVE fatigue, and AWFUL chest pain. I. am. getting. old.

So, after waiting for an hour in HIS office, reviewing my latest blood work, and readjusting my Synthroid dosage, I am finally able to exhale a huge sigh of relief.

I'm healthy.

But since my boobs are fatty, I'm going to put them on a strict diet.


Now let the celebrations of Matt's birthday begin!

24 comments:

Christy said...

Hurrah for just a fatty boobie!!!

Mom24 said...

Yay! Yay! Yay! Yay! and Yay! Such good news! So happy for you.

Sadie said...

Oh what wonderful news! I hope your thyroid gets back into whack fast so you can breathe easy again. Yay! Happy for you and your family!

anymommy said...

Awesome news.

Anonymous said...

I had those exact same symptoms when my thyroid was overdosed. It SUCKED. I hope you feel better soon!

Noble Glomads said...

Whew. Great news.

Dilem*mama said...

A glob of fat is fine. It's the "middle age" part that's, well, not right. ;-)

Betsy said...

Yay! That is such good news!!! I have a lump that I am watching right now. I need to have another mammo and ultrasound. I seem to have a million cysts on one side.

Nomads By Nature said...

wonderful news! Sighing in relief with/for you.

Emily said...

That is great news, although a long day.

I hope everything with your new medication adjustment, things will be better on that front.

Kat said...

Yahooooeeee!!!! That is fabulous news! Congratultions!
And I'm glad you are getting your medications changed. Hope you feel better soon! :)

Issa said...

I knew I needed to come over here today. I'm so glad to hear about all of this. I mean I guess your boobs need to what, lay off the wine? But I'm glad all is well.

Love you friend.

Daniela Swider said...

Fatty's great!!! You must be so relieved! So thrilled for you!

Kate Coveny Hood said...

Okay - I feel really dumb. I sent you a text this morning and didn't even think to check Twitter or your blog (exactly where did we meet again - oh right, ONLINE). Anyway - I'm SO relieved to hear that everything is okay. I once had a similar mammogram, sonogram, etc. experience due to a suspicious area the radiologiest saw. My diagnosis was "dense breast tissue." And I don't think it gets any sexier than that! The indignities we endure as we advance in age...

Happy birthday to Matt!

Anonymous said...

Yay for fatty boobs!

mosey (kim) said...

phew. What a relief! I've got fatty lumpy boobs myself so can relate...

Glad all is well, my friend!

eve said...

great news, jill! hope you two had nice b-day celebrations! (boobday/birthday?)

Shannon said...

WHEW! Such wonderful news!

Robin said...

Just got back from a few days away - what awesome news to come back to!

Hurray for healthy boobs!!!

A Joyful Chaos said...

Glad you had good news!

Kristi said...

Yeah! I am thrilled you have pudgy boobs! Great news! :) The girls and I will be back in June for a while- would love to take you and your "girls" out to Leesburg Outlets. :)

Unknown said...

Boob fat's cool. Yay for boob fat!

Heidi said...

Good news! So relieved and happy for you! Boob fat wins. :)

Anna Whiston-Donaldson said...

love your news and your boob fat!

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