11.24.2008

Uh Oh-B/GYN

I've been MIA again this past week, though I do have a great excuse... Riley brought home a horrible head cold that hit our house like a ton of bricks. She got the hacking cough and runny nose, while I got the cough and lost my voice. We've been battling this for almost a week, though it hit it's peak over the weekend and kept us house-bound the entire day Saturday and half of Sunday. I won't complain too much, as it was relaxing just laying on the couch and watching movie after movie. The only bummer is that I can't take anything for my cold!

Speaking of pregnancy, let me tell you a little bit about what it's like to be pregnant here in India. How can I put this delicately? Um... it's not fun. Let me rephrase that. If you've never been pregnant in the United States or in any other country that practices 1st world medicine, than you may not be as disappointed as I am. However, I had two very positive, clean, above-par experiences both in New Jersey with Riley and in Muscat, Oman with Sheridan, and here I cringe every time I have to go to the doctor.

The Consulate recommended an OB/GYN who does have experience training in the United States, but after my very first appointment it was obvious that she has little experience with high risk ladies. What do I mean by high risk? Thyroid issues, several miscarriages, several surgeries/procedures, complications from one of the surgeries that affected fertility, vein issues, advanced maternal age (yup that's what they call me) and a bevy of medications to maintain the pregnancy, all of which are documented with the never-ending amount of blood work that I've had done over the past year, along with the protocol from the OB/GYN I saw this past summer.

On my first visit to see her, I presented her with copies of everything, and explained my previous two years drama. Before even examining me she told me that I should stop taking all of my medication, and that everything is "fine." Really? She hadn't even done as much as take my blood pressure, and she know that I'm fine? With an entire waiting room outside filled with ladies who are concerned that they need to eat saffron to ensure that their babies are light skinned, she's now a clairvoyant who can look at me and tell I'm just "fine." With a population of over 1 billion people, an abundance of freaky disabilities, a high infant mortality rate, malnutrition, and her entire idea of prenatal care is to tell me "relax" and I'm "fine." Clearly we're not starting out on the right foot.

In my 8 or so appointments I've had with her or her staff members, they have yet to follow any of the ACOG (American College of OB/GYN's). No blood work has been done, none of the obligatory blood pressure or urine tests, no baseline exams. While the waiting room is relatively clean, you don't even want me to begin explaining what the bathrooms are like - or how I had to roll up my pants today when I had to go. Or better yet, how they use one plastic sheet on the table for everyone in the ultrasound room. They don't change them - or even flip them over! Or the smells... and how there's no air conditioning... and the pregnant nose is an overly sensitive nose. I'm always on the verge of gagging on the odors. On my last visit I got so upset that I had several choice words for her, the incompetence, the way she runs her practice, and then stormed out of the office... though not before noticing this sign and snapping a photo (thankfully I had my camera with me). It was all too fitting for that moment.





In a city of over 7 million people, I'm sure there has to be at least one other doctor who I can trust. We'll see... In the meantime, it's a good thing that we didn't want to find out the sex of the baby. Obviously they wouldn't even tell me if we wanted to know!



33 comments:

G in Berlin said...

I'm so sorry. I am sure that you can find someone else. Strangely enough, the worst dr. I found here in Berlin was through the Embassy. Everyone else was so much better. I got my ob-gyn here through asking the pediatrician I love and the 3 he recommended were all great.

Do you know anyone who has had a baby that can tell you of their dr's?

Mom24 said...

Oh Jill, that does sound AWFUL! It must be so hard to finally get pregnant with that wonderful baby and then have all these unnecessary and ridiculous things to worry you. I hope you can find someone more knowledgeable (to put it delicately). Good luck. (((Hugs)))

My shoulder's pretty big, you can always complain on it.

Laural Out Loud said...

Congratulations!! I'm so happy for you!

And how totally crappy to have had such a bad experience with your OB. Did you stop your medications are are you still taking them? Have you been getting recommendations? Hopefully you'll find someone who is a better match for you and your needs.

My daughter is begging for a baby sister, and really doesn't seem to understand that we can't pick, lol.

Tara R. said...

I truly hope you can find a more competent doctor.

Heidi said...

No words. I couldn't do it girl, you are so strong. I am sure there has to be one good dr. that you can trust. I pray you find them.

American in Norway said...

Oh honey.... Hang in there... when do you get to go back to the states?

If you HAVE to go back to her, I would bring my own sheet... (I am not even kidding) & just smile & say "well, in America..."

As you can tell I was a really big hit when Bjørn & Eva were in the hospital this summer!

HANG IN THERE!

The Mom said...

Wow what an experience for sure!
Plus how hard is it to be sick and pregnant and not able to take meds!!?? Been there. Hugs sweetie, hang in there!!

trashalou said...

I'm with 'AiN' - take your own sheet!

But first of all I would look around for someone else. You must be able to get recommendations from someone.

Tenakim said...

I'm so sorry... that kind of takes all the fun (relatively speaking) out of pregnancy. Hang in there, we're here for ya!

Jen said...

Oh, the drama. That has got to be so awful to not have a doctor that you can trust. Can you email one from the States? I hope that you find one soon and that you are feeling better again soon.

Kelly said...

Ewwwww! Yuck!!!!!!!!! Disgusting!!!!!!

Okay, totally naive question...isn't there an American base of some sort near by with a military hospital you could use? I can't believe she told you to stop all your meds...What did she train in the states for a day?!

Sending lots of good thoughts your way...hoping you find an adequate physician!

Kim said...

I really hope you find a doctor you can trust.. I cannot imagine how this is stressing you out. Hugs to you Jill.. big big hugs.

JIC

Kat said...

Oh wow! I can't even imagine. And I thought you'd be able to get great care. Especially since so many Americans head there for the medical tourism things. I guess pregnancy is not on that list, though...

When do you come back to the states? Will you have to come back sooner?

Simple Answer said...

oof. that is tough. here is where I have faith. I have faith (enough for both of us ~ cuz I can't imagine how hard it would be to muster any) that this will be okay.

karey m. said...

what. the. hell.

i don't even need to tell you to take care of yourself {no one there will!}...and remind me, if i ever tell you i want to move to india...remind me, won't you?

what. the. hell.

Nap Warden said...

OMG...For so many reasons...OMG!
I want to pack you up and take you back to the US...
I can't believe she said you were "fine" without knowing anything!

OHmommy said...

Wow. Just wow.

That last sign... OMG, are you sure it's not a joke. Wow.

OHmommy said...

Wow. Just wow.

That last sign... OMG, are you sure it's not a joke. Wow.

jewelstreet said...

Oh, boy! I feel for you!! I really do. I cannot imagine especially being high risk. Are there any US military doctors around you could maybe go see?

Diane Mandy said...

Oh my heart is going out to you!!! Like you I've got a checkered medical history, am of advanced maternal age, and on medication to help support the pregnancy--I cannot imagine if I didn't have the confidence and assurances of a good doctor! Wow. I hope you find someone better SOON!

Michelle said...

Dang, Jill! I missed 2 weeks and you're pregnant! Congratulations!

I can somewhat sympathize with you, as I had a medical emergency while pregnant with my second and visiting my parents in Costa Rica. Of course, it was just one week, I can't imagine living the whole 9 months in that way!

Hope things get better for you and the FOETUS.

Eve Grey said...

OMG. All I have to say is it is good it's your third or you'd probably be totally wigging out. Are you ok with all this or are you worried?
The foetus law is to protect the baby from selective abortion based on gender b/c boys are preferable right?

WheresMyAngels said...

Oh no. Prayers that your pregnancy will go well. That is really scary.

I've never had any issues with my pregnancies myself, a few miscarriages but that is probably due to the translocation I carry. I do remember the doctor screaming at me for not coming in til I was 5 months pregnant and I was like "what is the big deal" But I do understand if their is other medical things going on you need care.

If I was pregnant, I would of puked reading your post, when you talked about the smells and the "one sheet"

Mrs4444 said...

Deep breaths....deep breaths... There must be someone over there who is competent; I hope you find him/her.

manolosonamission.com said...

Are you kidding!? I cannot believe its illegal to find out the sex? Is that in India as a whole or just the region? When will you go back to the states? Will you take the girls with you?

Blogging Mama said...

I'd be on the first plane outta there till little babe was born. You are far braver than I my dear.

I hope you find someone who can at least follow some modern practices.

mary said...

OK, what?! You're PREGNANT?! God, I've been gone too long! CONGRATULATIONS!!

I hope that your care improves, though. This is one thing I would be such a stickler about. Yikes.

I'm so happy for you!!

Suzanne said...

".......All your complaints can be taken to the Administrator or the Director"......who will promptly ignore them.

I agree with some of the others who suggested a U.S. Military doctor. I don't know if the foreign service has any type of agreement with the U.S. military that would allow that.

I'm praying for you Jill. Also worrying about what I see on the news today about violent happenings in India today. Stay safe.

- Suzanne, the Farmer's Wife

Hyphen Mama said...

Wow. Just wow.

There's no place like home.

Good luck, dear. This will be a long 2nd and 3rd trimester with a dr you can't trust.

Those signs: priceless.

Eve Grey said...

Is everything ok with you guys? I don't know if you're near this violence...

Hairline Fracture said...

How horrible for you! I will keep my fingers crossed that you find a better doctor.

sarah said...

I recently came across your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I don't know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.

Sarah

http://www.thetreadmillguide.com

psychoknitter said...

I love your blog but have never commented before! My guess is that there is an American or European midwife in Chennai somewhere who can steer you in the right direction - you can find her, you can!

Also - they are not allowed to determine the sex of the baby due to the problem of infanticide and abortion of baby girls. Sad but true!

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